Prepare the tofu crumbles by mixing the tofu, dark soy sauce, rice wine vinegar, chinese 5 spice powder, sugar, white pepper, msg (optional), and neutral oil. Mix well and set aside.
Make the sauce by combining the sesame paste, chilli crisp, sesame oil, light soy sauce, sugar, and black vinegar (if using). Add 4-5 tbsp of noodle water and mix well.
Cook the chinese noodles according to package instructions. Drain and reserve some of the noodle water.
In a pan, sauté the spring onion whites, ginger, and garlic until fragrant.
Add the tofu crumbles and sauté for a few minutes until heated through.
Add the cooked noodles and the sauce. Toss everything together, adding a bit more noodle water if needed to coat the noodles.
Serve the tofu dan dan noodles hot, garnished with spring onion greens, crushed peanuts, and chili oil.
