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Preheat the oven to 400F and prepare two sheet pans.
Add the cooked and cooled rice to one sheet pan, along with all of the listed seasonings and sauces. Toss until completely coated, and place in the oven on the top rack for 40 minutes, tossing halfway through, until crispy. Before taking it out of the oven, to achieve an even crispier rice, you can place your oven on broil at high heat for 1 to 2 minutes.
While the rice bakes, prepare your warm salad base. On the second sheet pan, add the finely chopped Brussels sprouts, kale and onion, and toss. Add olive oil, salt and pepper, and place the oven on the lower rack for 20 minutes, until warmed and tender.
While the rice and salad base cook, prepare the dressing. Combine all listed ingredients in a jar and whisk until smooth, adding 1 to 2 tablespoons of water as needed to thin.
Remove the salad base from the oven and transfer to a bowl. Toss in the dressing and finish off with the crispy rice, which gives a "bacon bits" feel to the salad.