Lightly cook bacon at medium-low (not crispy-keep those fats intact), diced.
Steam the cauliflower until tender, drain.
Blend ¾ of the cauliflower with all other ingredients except the bacon in a high-powered blender.
Stir in the bacon. Pulse until chunky.
For amazing flavor, add 1 to 2 tablespoons of the bacon grease (as long as it didn't smoke when you were cooking it at a low temperature).